Symbolism and Differences

We've been talking a lot about symbols and the function of symbolism in my D&C class lately. One of the interesting things that we've discussed a lot in class is how the meanings of different symbols change depending on their usage. Many people have pointed out that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has a lot of similar symbolism to Freemasonry. It's true--we do. However, we also have a lot of the same symbols used in Catholicism, Judaism, Protestantism, and many other religions and organizations. I guess it just struck me, because I'd never really thought about how much the symbolism of various groups overlap. I think a lot of times we as humans tend to look for the differences between others' beliefs and our own, and then when comparing two sets of beliefs that we don't necessarily uphold, we tend to lump them together and not value their distinguishing characteristics. In reality, I think we all have a lot more in common than we give ourselves credit for.

I guess it made me realize how important it is to recognize that many religions really do share the same beliefs. Because I am a Latter-day Saint, or a Mormon, as we're so often called, I believe that Jesus Christ is my Savior, and that I cannot be saved without Him. I believe that each person on earth is a child of God and that He loves each of us individually more than we can comprehend. I believe that families are the most important social unit on the earth today and that strong families can only help society. I believe that by being honest, kind, selfless, and aware of other people, individuals will be much happier in this life. I believe that God has something greater in mind for us in the life after this one. I believe He wants us to take care of this amazing earth that He created for us. I believe a lot of things that a lot of other people in a lot of other religions believe as well, but when I or other people focus on our differences and refuse to try to see each other around the differences, that's when animosity, miscommunication, and prejudice on either side happen. I believe a lot of things that others may think are weird or untrue, but that's okay. People are allowed to think what they please--I'm allowed to believe what I do, and they're allowed to believe I'm crazy or deluded, if they wish. :)

In our symbolism discussion, we discussed how although the icons of the symbols overlap, the meanings of them are often very different. Thus, it's very important to ask people what their symbols mean before judging them. I guess that's where the differences thing comes in again. Though we all believe different things in addition to those we have in common, if we just seek to understand others' beliefs and see things from their point of view, the animosity, miscommunication, and prejudice all but disappears. That's because we're seeking to understand them before trying to make them see our point of view.

The whole discussion just reminded me over and over again of how important it is to accept and be slow to judge. And all of those thoughts about similarities and differences stemmed from a discussion about symbols. I had a lot of other cool thoughts about the power of and importance of symbols, but I'll save those for another time. (This is already getting long.) However, I know I keep looking for symbols in my life and the world around me as a result of the discussion--but I hope I become a little more patient and understanding in the process as well. After all, if I can't live the way I wish the world were myself, what's the point of wishing it? Gandhi said, "You must be the change you wish to see in the world." It's got to start somewhere. Why not with me?

That's the way it is. Now what are you going to do about it?

This weekend, my sister Sharon came to visit me. It was so, so fun to have her here. And as fun as it would be to give a travel log of everything that we did, I'm actually not going to do that. But while she was here, we had some really good conversations about a plethora of different things. (Yes, I did just say plethora. I like that word.)

In one of these conversations, we were discussing how often people get upset at situations that are less than ideal. We tend to blame other people for a situation that we don't like or are uncomfortable with, and a lot of times, we aren't willing to do anything about it to change it. Then we looked at people who seem to be in control of their lives, who don't get angry about stupid little things, and what the difference was between the two. And you know, the difference is just in the attitude. Having an attitude of complaining or criticism about people or things does not do any good. The people that I know that are most in control of their lives don't get wrapped up in their little frustrations. They seem to take the attitude of, "Well, that's just the way it is. Now what am I going to do about it?" It seems so simple. And really, everyone knows that it doesn't do any good to complain and whine. Taking the proactive attitude and refusing to let yourself be acted on is so much better--but we all do it from time to time anyway.

We talked about this the other day in D&C. We were talking about when to give and receive advice, and in the course of the conversation, someone said, "You know, it's easy to serve people you like. What about when you rub against people?" Since no one is perfectly happy with anyone else all the time, we just kind of have to figure out that disagreements and frustrations and annoyances are going to arise. The key is, what do we do when we do rub against people like that? What do I do when I'm starting to be critical of other people? It's an interesting thought. And what we do in these situations is extraordinarily revealing about our character, I think.

That's just the way it is. Now what are we going to do about it?

Words, words, words...

I've been thinking a lot lately about the significance of words. I guess you could say that making sure that I have the right word in the right place at the right time is a minor obsession of mine. (And yet I still make mistakes in expressing myself so, so often...hmm...) Most of what I've been thinking about has been in relation to words in communication and conversation with others. Now, I am not a quiet, sit-on-the-sidelines kind of person, especially if a subject comes up that I feel strongly about. Generally, if I have an opinion about something and it's important to me, I am anxious to voice it and explain what I think and why. The interesting thing is, nearly all of my dearest friends are the same way. We love to discuss things--anything from politics to books to what we can and can't wear to whether butter on your bread is better at room temperature or refrigerated. (Definitely room temp, by the way.) And yet, we have never fought or dealt with typical roommate girl drama. Naturally, we disagree about many things and sometimes try to make the other person understand our point of view a little too hard (I think I'm probably the most guilty here), but we've never really fought or been angry with one another. So why? Why is it that six girls who have such strong opinions about so many things and who know each other so well manage to get out of arguments like that?

I think it kind of has to do with something that we talked about in Doctrine and Covenants the other day. We read a verse talking about "jarrings" in the scriptural context, and someone asked what that words meant. After a bit of discussion, someone else said that they thought it meant getting into heated discussions or debates that feel contentious and unkind, even if they aren't straight-up arguments. I agree with that. And I guess that's why I've felt like my discussions with my wonderful roommates don't turn into fights or arguments--they aren't "jarrings." As soon as it starts to feel unkind or like any one of us is being too pushy, everyone present seems to take the cue to back off. We all try to calm down the tone of our words, and everyone apologizes for getting too worked up. I even received a text message the other day from one of these lovely, beautiful girls apologizing for beginning to be contentious in a conversation we'd had. And really, I was the one who was more at fault than she.

I guess it just boils down to how important sensitivity in our communication is. I don't think you have to sacrifice clarity or opinion for the sake of speaking kindly. I don't think you have to be a doormat either. But I look at the people with whom I feel the safest and that I trust the most, and invariably, they are the people that are the kindest in their manner of speaking to me. Unfortunately, the reason I've been thinking about it and noticing it so much is because it's something that I am trying desperately to work on--to be more gentle in my speech and more loving and accepting in my words. Speaking of which, this is getting long. Guess I've waxed a little eloquent. It's interesting to notice though. Maybe the more I notice the kindness of others, the better I'll be able to be at ridding my conversation of these "jarrings" and critical, contentious words.